We Don’t Need Therapists to Heal

We Don’t Need Therapists to Heal

I’m going to drop another one of my own truths that probably isn’t a very popular opinion.  It’s simple … It’s taking back the healing of our hearts from others and placing it solidly in our own hands.

So here goes nothing…

I don’t think we need a therapist to heal!

(I think they can be helpful and a tool in our pocket … but need is a very strong word.  I’ve seen instances where people have been with the same therapist for YEARS and are still working on the same issues, in the same ways … it can be an enabling situation too.)

Picture taken on January 15, 2012 in LilI also believe that for the majority of us … we do not need medication to deal with our emotions.  In fact, I believe that a lot of psychological medications can have an opposite effect of helping us heal our hearts. They give us a means of escape, not necessarily freedom from what lives inside.

There are cases where medications can bring us back from the brink and can help stabilize someone’s emotions and of course there are situations where an imbalance needs to be corrected … but when I say psychological medications to heal the heart, I’m talking about healing trauma, healing PTSD, healing our hearts from the breakages and scars that life and others have thrust upon us.

And that’s not to say that if everyone got off their daily mediations everything would be wonderful, or shits and giggles, as the saying goes  … I actually think that our culture is such that if everyone flushed those very same daily medications tomorrow everything might just fall apart, not only because the medications do nothing for our actual feelings but push them down deeper, but because we don’t have the tools or the empathy or patience or time allotted to us in order to heal ourselves without them.  Not to mention that I think we have been conditioned to fear our own pain.

So there’s that …

giphy-downsized-3We’ve also been conditioned to believe we need to look outside of ourselves to heal our own hearts … how backward is that?


We’ve been conditioned to think that the same handful of medications can heal everyone’s hearts that are scarred from so many different things in so many different ways.

Let me lay this down here … Everyone does not heal in the same way, we all have different needs and ways of healing … there is no antibiotic to emotional pain.  (And as we’ve seen, the overuse of antibiotics has given rise to antibiotic-resistant strains of bacteria like c-diff … imagine that on an emotional level)

This should be an empowering idea. This should be something that boosts you into your power.

You have the answers inside of you.

By telling your truth, by being honest, by moving through it and sticking with it … you are in control.

I’m not saying it’s easy to heal.  For most, the path of healing their own heart is rife with fear, tests of courage, the release of tightly held thinking, overflowing emotion and bursts of thinking that may not make sense.  It’s like playing a record backward and trying to make sense of it all even as we’ve collected data on it, filed it away and color-coded it so that we can lock it up somewhere and forget about it … so we have to basically upend our entire system of security to go there …

But it’s all yours

No one knows it better

Not a medication

Not a therapist

Not a friend of a family member

It’s yours

And in and of that, you can decide what to do with it if you choose to heal your heart.

That is power.

You choose the tools you keep by your side too!


And if you can move through your own healing you can be more available for others and you can be honest about your judgments and where they come from and you can offer up your experience in healthy ways to generations in front and behind us.

If that’s not real change, I don’t know what is.

In my next few posts, I’ll go over some simple ways to alleviate anxiety and fear and depression that stems from outside influences and list some resources if you’re looking to heal your heart on your own terms.  🙂 

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